There once was a girl named Jill
Who tried dynamite stick for a thrill
They found her vagina
In North Carolina
And bits of her tits in Brazil.
Author: Hardy
There once was a man from Saint Paul
There once was a man from Saint Paul
Who danced in musical halls
His favorite trick was to stand on his dick
And slide off the stage on his balls.
What gets longer if pulled, fits snugly between breasts, slides neatly into a hole, chokes people when used incorrectly, and works well when jerked?
A seatbelt, you dirty thinking bastard!
Little johnny wakes up one night hearing noises from his parents bedroom…
He opens the door to his parents room and sees mom, handcuffed to the bed’s headboard, dad ramming her from behind. Johnny screams. Dad turns to looks at him, laughs and gives mom a slap on the bum for good measure. Johnny runs away, screaming. Once dad has finished mom off, he uncuffs her. She immediately says, ‘You better go tell Johnny everything is OK, the shit he just saw could scar him for life”. Dad rolls his eyes and begrudgingly agrees. Pulls on his robe and heads for Johnny’s room only to find it’s empty. He then heads for the TV room but when he passes the guest room, he notices the door is ajar, noises coming from inside. He opens the door to look in and sees Granny on her hands and knees, little Johnny fucking her from behind. Dad screams. Johnny turns around looks at him and says “Yeah, not so funny when it’s your mom huh?”
I asked my boss “what’s the difference between your wife and tomorrow?”
“I’m not coming in tomorrow”
Daughter: Mom, is it true that the baby comes out of the same hole that the penis goes in?
Mom: Yes, that’s true.
Daughter: So will my teeth break?